When the greys started to appear in my hair, several women asked me if I was going to start coloring. My answer was always the same; "nah, I'm going to just embrace the chaos." Some gave me the ol' "good for you," but many more looked at me like I was nuts. After high school, I needed a really good reason to wear makeup. When the "no Photoshop" trend took place awhile back, I joked with my friends that for once I was a trend setter." I completely agree we need to do what feels comfortable for us and not for others. I'm starting to see those typical lines appear on my face. Some days they bother me more than others, and like you, I'm not sure if I will ever do anything about them. But for now, I'm good.
Well said! I love every bit of this article and thank you for writing it and for being a beacon of something different. I feel I am in good company right here.
I appreciate this! It's so hard to navigate it all. No judgement. Was just hoping too open the beauty space a little and perhaps give us all so breathing room!
I started going gray in my early 30s and LOVED it. The way it came in was so fun, and I got lots of compliments on it. But as I've entered my 40s, I've found myself wrestling with the fact that many women my age color their hair which makes me look older than them. I am staying in the fight. I don't want to color my hair, but it is a fight. You feel the pressure.
On the other hand, when I see women in their 70s with no gray, it looks incongruous to me. It looks almost creepy, like something is wrong.
I appreciate your encouragement to not buy in to capturing eternal youth, but to grow ourselves into a new beauty. I needed the reminder.
I feel this way about Botox. You look older because everyone around you has zero wrinkles or fine lines. It’s definitely a pressure and everyone needs to do what they feel good with. 💕
My friend and I were just talking about this at lunch today. We are both women of a certain age, and we are learning to live with it, not keep fighting it.
The idea of fighting this process for the next however many decades just sounds exhausting (and expensive.) I’d rather find a way to peacefully and gently maintain what I can for as long as I can.
Somehow we went from Phoebe Cates to Pamela Anderson! I’m about to turn 56. When I feel dismayed by the ageing process (rarely these days), I remember that my body is doing EXACTLY what it is designed to do. I mean, how beautiful is that?? And I know that to deny this (lamenting, fighting) is to deny my very nature. Which is to grow old and die. That’s just insanity. These realisations bring me deep awe, peace, and gratitude.
Oh my gosh! I just did a double take reading this because I started the second part of this essay literally today, and it begins with me talking about Pamela Anderson and her natural renaissance! That is so wild. 😂💕
Look up @nevertox on Instagram and read/watch some of their stories.
Yesss. I didn't even get into this aspect of the side effects and risk. That account will stop you in your tracks....
When the greys started to appear in my hair, several women asked me if I was going to start coloring. My answer was always the same; "nah, I'm going to just embrace the chaos." Some gave me the ol' "good for you," but many more looked at me like I was nuts. After high school, I needed a really good reason to wear makeup. When the "no Photoshop" trend took place awhile back, I joked with my friends that for once I was a trend setter." I completely agree we need to do what feels comfortable for us and not for others. I'm starting to see those typical lines appear on my face. Some days they bother me more than others, and like you, I'm not sure if I will ever do anything about them. But for now, I'm good.
Yes whatever feels right—in both directions! It’s a hard transformation and there should be grace allotted all around. Thanks for sharing!
Well said! I love every bit of this article and thank you for writing it and for being a beacon of something different. I feel I am in good company right here.
I appreciate this! It's so hard to navigate it all. No judgement. Was just hoping too open the beauty space a little and perhaps give us all so breathing room!
Very good conversation we need to have on beauty 🥀 thank you
We need to help each other lol! 😭
I started going gray in my early 30s and LOVED it. The way it came in was so fun, and I got lots of compliments on it. But as I've entered my 40s, I've found myself wrestling with the fact that many women my age color their hair which makes me look older than them. I am staying in the fight. I don't want to color my hair, but it is a fight. You feel the pressure.
On the other hand, when I see women in their 70s with no gray, it looks incongruous to me. It looks almost creepy, like something is wrong.
I appreciate your encouragement to not buy in to capturing eternal youth, but to grow ourselves into a new beauty. I needed the reminder.
I feel this way about Botox. You look older because everyone around you has zero wrinkles or fine lines. It’s definitely a pressure and everyone needs to do what they feel good with. 💕
Love this essay. Thank you for all you say in this.
Thank you for letting me know this. ✨
My friend and I were just talking about this at lunch today. We are both women of a certain age, and we are learning to live with it, not keep fighting it.
The idea of fighting this process for the next however many decades just sounds exhausting (and expensive.) I’d rather find a way to peacefully and gently maintain what I can for as long as I can.
Somehow we went from Phoebe Cates to Pamela Anderson! I’m about to turn 56. When I feel dismayed by the ageing process (rarely these days), I remember that my body is doing EXACTLY what it is designed to do. I mean, how beautiful is that?? And I know that to deny this (lamenting, fighting) is to deny my very nature. Which is to grow old and die. That’s just insanity. These realisations bring me deep awe, peace, and gratitude.
Loving Pam Anderson’s natural embrace these days
Oh my gosh! I just did a double take reading this because I started the second part of this essay literally today, and it begins with me talking about Pamela Anderson and her natural renaissance! That is so wild. 😂💕